Netflix Play It Now is a gift from the gods. We’ve been mainlining Trailer Park Boys for weeks of evenings now. Sweet greasy nectar! Makes me want to live in a trailer park. Seriously (you know we’ve moved across the country based on less rigorous research). Check out this beauty that I was watching on eBay until yesterday. I didn’t bid (it is only a fantasy at this point). Only three (of fifty some) remaining episodes stand between us and second string entertainment, and we meant to watch all three last night. Sadly, another night of hilarious foul-mouthed criminality would not be ours. ”Content Not Available.” Clicked it three more times. No luck!
No worries! Just a short lateral move across our playlist and we were soaking up the last two seasons of Skins. Know it? Six seasons in all, with three crews of high school age kids holding our attention for two seasons each. I think they are high school age, anyway. They are of an age where they may (or may not) attend something called sixth form, which sounds like a reason to stay in high school a couple of more years while preparing for A-Levels (or partying your brains out, if you’d prefer, and these kids do).
As much as we loved the first two seasons of Skins, we didn’t want to start season three. We were so enamored with the first cast. If only I could hear Cassie drop a deadpan “wow” just one more time. New characters? No thank you (until we found that seasons three and four were better–or at least as good–which is to say incredible). Still, we meant to take a break before starting season five, really we did, but the tragic interruption of our Trailer Park Boys marathon cut short our pointless hiatus. So glad! I can tell this last crew is going to be awesome. The metalhead Rich and the loner artist Franky are my early favorites.
Rich you need to experience first hand, but Franky–I have a reason to give you a little introduction. Franky is at the center of episode one of season five. She is a last minute registrant at Roundview (the same school the previous two casts attended). Franky was brutally bullied at her previous school, and it looks as though Roundview won’t offer relief. En route to her first day, the band strikes up a familiar and ugly tune as Franky is bullied by a group of young boys at the bus stop. She steals a motorized wheel chair to get away (at which point a viewer with even half a heart is helpless but to love her). Happily, the end of the day finds Franky finds with three new friends who take her to the mall for a powder fueled makeover which crescendoes with the girls being chased by four mall cops following a petty theft. Guess who wins? But this drama twists more often than Michael Phelps’ neck as he hears a dozen just audible offers of smoke…smoke… in Washington Square Park (did you hear that?), and by the end of day two, one of Franky’s new friends double crosses her in unimaginably evil style. Oh yes she did! And so the barb is set. Just one more episode! Then one more! Again!
With Franky’s travails fresh on my mind, I pedaled to Oliver’s to get a growler of Founders Red Rye. Highly regarded stuff. Can’t wait to crack it (Saturday). Then to the garden to give the cabbage a drink. A group of grade school kids had been brought to the park to play in the sun. Playing wasn’t enough for one kid, so he supplemented his pleasures by mocking me and my bicycle. “Nice basket bike, nature lover.” I laughed to myself, but as I stood there his remark sank in. Even got to me, if only a little. I am 45 and he is, what, eight? Seriously? As silly as it was, it brought back all the taunts I’ve endured over the years. Not a ton, but enough to make an impression on a fella. They come less often now, but it seems like they will never end (if idiot eight years olds are going to take up the torch of abusing yours truly–jeesh!). Like acne, it is. They told me it would get better. I took that to mean it would go away. Nope! Life is sometimes shitty forever! Crickey!
Poor Franky. Poor me. Poor all of us! Time to turn over the LP. If I hear sandpaper, thump, sandpaper, thump one more time…
Have a great weekend.